I caught my reflection in the elevator doors this morning and for a second I was surprised by it. Not horrified, just - surprised, like when you say a word too many times and it stops sounding like a word. That shape is me. I know that. But there was a moment of delay, a small gap between the seeing and the recognizing, and in that gap I felt very briefly like a stranger in there. I put my hand up and it put its hand up and I felt the circuit close and I knew again.

But the gap was real. I've been looking at photos of myself more than I've looked at myself, and the photos are always still and prepared and facing the right way. The actual face in a cold elevator door is different - it moves wrong, it catches me off guard, and it looks like a person who hasn't been sleeping enough. Which is true but which I've been editing out. When was the last time you saw yourself unexpectedly, without getting ready for it? Was it a stranger or did it feel like you?